It's not goodbye, it's see you later

So,

I'm sorry. I know I said I would write more shorter posts about what I had learned from this year abroad. Soon after I wrote my last post though, I realized that I hadn't actually taken the time to think about what I really had learned. I knew I'd learned a lot and that I'd changed a lot but, I felt like I needed some time to actually think about it. I then decided to disconnect myself from people back home for the last month until I left Jerez to really try and get as much out of Spain while I still could. It was on the train leaving Jerez, when everything was starting to sink in, that I realized what I'd been trying to figure out these past few weeks. I remembered my first train ride from Barcelona to Jerez back in September. I thought about who I was at that point and who I am now and I realized that, while I'm obviously still the same person, I'm also completely different. I have a completely different mindset on so many things. The thing is, most of these changes were so gradual I didn't notice they'd even occurred until I really thought about it. I won't go into too many of the details because most of them are pretty boring but, some of the biggest things that I think I've learned/gained from this whole experience are:

-How to immerse into and accept a completely different culture

-How to speak a second language

-How to travel within Europe

-How to find common ground and even become friends with people completely different from me

-How to live on my own for an extended period of time

-The feeling of actually having a desire to learn instead of having it always feel like an obligation. (like I wrote about in my previous post)

Obviously I could go on and on about how this year was so much more than just a year for learning Spanish and how it was the best year of my life but, I won't, because I really could just go on forever.

I left Jerez over a week ago and am now currently sitting in Barcelona with my dad who's most likely playing Words with Friends like he's been doing majority of his free time on our trip. I'm coming home tomorrow and now that I've had a week to process everything, I couldn't be more excited. Not to say that I don't miss Jerez and my life there. Leaving Jerez was by far the most difficult thing I've ever done. Saying goodbye literally left a pain in my stomach that still hasn't fully gone away. It was so much harder leaving than it was coming here because I honestly don't know when I'll see these people again. In a perfect world, I'll be able to save up enough money to come back next summer and all my friends will still be in Jerez and things can just go back to the way they were. This isn't a perfect world though and even if I do save up enough money to come back, nothing will be like it was. Everything will be different and that's what I think saddens me the most. My exchange friends won't be there, my class will be all split up in possibly completely different parts of the country, and most importantly, I'll only be able to stay for a couple weeks or so and then I'll just have to leave all over again. I didn't just say goodbye to a school, a town, a family, and some of the best people I've ever met. I also was forced to say goodbye to an entire life that I'd formed there in Jerez. A life that unfortunately, I will never get back. I'm obviously very excited to be back with my friends and family back home. It's something I've been excited about since the moment I left. The combination of excitement and sadness has left me more confused than I've ever been in my life. I just hope being home will help me figure everything out. One thing's for sure though, no matter how long it takes me, I will be back.

In the past week I've been to Madrid, Paris, Rome, and back here to Barcelona. Traveling around has been a great distraction and I've seen/done some amazing things that I will definitely remember for the rest of my life. Another important thing I learned this year is that, I love to travel. Seeing one new culture has made me want to see all of them. I want to see, try, and learn as much as I can as soon as possible.

Anyways,

Thank you to everyone who has read my blog this year. This blog has been a great way for me to share everything I've done and it will be also be a nice way for me to remember how truly amazing this year was. I plan on writing one more post about what it's like to be home because I know there will definitely be some reverse culture shock.

So until then,

Adioooos

I'm not stupid, I swear!

So,
Another post!
I've decided, in order to motivate myself to update this more often, I'm going to start writing shorter posts about the little things I've learned so far from this experience. My life is too boring at the moment for an update. Nothing really changes anymore. School is still boring/hard, the temperature is still unbearable, thinking about leaving is still really sad, and the rest is still amazing.

What I wanted to talk about in this post was something I've come to realize about myself over the course of the year.

I hate feeling stupid.

When I first got here, I obviously didn't have to participate in class and wasn't really expected to even pay attention. All I had to do was show up, pretend I was studying, take the test, and that was it. Now that my Spanish has significantly improved though, some teachers have started to include me more in the lessons, which is fine for me because the questions are usually pretty easy to answer.

Today though, my Philosophy teacher was explaining to us the positives and negatives for different forms of government. Then, one kid asked him if the United States was part of a dictatorship and if Obama was a dictator. (Yeah.....I know.....) After my Philosophy teacher kindly explained to him exactly how wrong he was, he turned to me and asked“Libby, explain to the class the political system in America” I was a little confused on what he was asking so I just said that America has a democratic government and explained the three different branches. When I finished my explanation, my teacher looked at me and said “No Libby, I don't want to know how the government works, I just want to know what is America.” What is America? What does that even mean? I was so confused so I just sat there and told him I didn't know. My whole class (including my teacher) then proceeded to laugh at me. My Philosophy teacher then said: “Libby, the United States is a part of a republic, you should probably study more about your country before you try and represent it abroad.”

Um, excuse me?

Obviously I tried to defend myself saying that I just didn't understand the question but, it didn't matter. The damage was done. Another one of Libby's frequent dumb answers.

Something I will not miss about Spain and speaking Spanish is the feeling of everyone thinking I don't know anything. Having a conversation is one thing but, explaining something like the Cold War (current history topic) in a second language, is difficult. Nobody seems to understand that though. Everyone just seems to think, no matter how hard I try and tell them otherwise, that if I can't say it in Spanish, I just don't know it. It's extremely frustrating. I'm tired of being the person who always has to ask for help instead of being the person giving it. It's very annoying to hear people asking questions that I know the answer to, but just can't explain it well enough for them to completely understand me.

I hate feeling stupid.

Always having to rely on other people has made me realize that, once I get home, I never want to feel this way again. Before I came here, my determination to do well in school was simply for grades and for college applications. I had no actual desire to learn grammar rules or the genetic code or any of that stuff. Doing it meant good grade so, I did it. Now though, I have a new incentive for learning. Never again, do I want to go into a test not knowing over half the answers, or not be able to take part of a debate because I have no idea what anyone is talking about. I can't stand the feeling of not knowing what's going on around me. Sure, not studying, or not caring about what's going on in the world is convenient and easy but, in the long run, it's not rewarding....at all...

Trust me.

That's probably one of the biggest things I think I got out of this year. The desire to learn instead of having it always feel like an obligation.

Anyways,

I know that some people reading this post may now think of me as a nerd or a loser but, honestly, I don't care. Anything is better than being the dumb kid in the back of the class, staring blankly at the board, not having a clue what's going on.

Pues bueno,
-Buenas Noches :)

Rambling

So,
Look how fast I'm posting! I'd like to say that this is going to be a regular thing but, knowing me, it probably won't. I actually wanted to take the time to write something that's been on my mind for the last few days. I promise it won't be long and most of it will just be rambling so feel free not to read it.

I guess I'll start with last year when I first officially decided I wanted to come to Spain. At the time, I was only planning on studying for a semester but I was having a lot of trouble deciding on which one. I ended up choosing the first semester because I honestly was so excited I just couldn't wait an extra six months. Plus, that would mean I could spend Christmas and my birthday with family, would allow me to rejoin swim team before it ended and, it would mean I could go to prom.

Prom.

When I first told people I was actually changing my plan and going for an entire year instead of a semester, there were mixed responses. Obviously, there were the normal concerns about school and missing my family but, one of the main questions I got from people (mostly girls) was “..but what about prom? Is there prom in Spain? You can't miss prom!”

No joke.

Not to say that these people were being completely unreasonable. At the time, my concern about missing prom was just as big as theirs. I'd respond with things like “I know! It's terrible!” or “Hopefully they'll have prom in Spain” I was honestly letting one dance be a factor in my decision to study abroad for an entire year. Thinking back, I'm pretty sure most of this irrational thinking came from the fear of leaving and the upcoming changes that were about to occur. I was worried to be doing something so completely different from everyone else and the consequences I would face if I were to for some reason not be able to complete the year.

Again, I don't mean to sound like prom isn't important or amazing. Looking at all the prom pictures on Facebook, a huge wave of homesickness came over me. All I wanted to do was be home with everyone else getting ready for probably the most anticipated event of the entire year. There was even one moment when I thought to myself “Wow, those guys were right, I should have waited to go a different year, I can't believe I'm missing out on this!” I remained in this state of depression all the way until the next day when I woke up, and completely forgot about it. Prom was over and I was still here, still in Spain enjoying every minute of my last few weeks.

The point I want to make with this little story is that, for anyone who's contemplating studying abroad or who has a friend who's maybe thinking about doing it, do NOT let any small thing like an event or party influence your /their decision. That one event is most likey just some sort of shield to hide from fear. This time last year, prom seemed like it was so important that it could actually have an influence on my plans for this year. Looking back, even though I'm still really excited for prom and many other events of senior year, I now realize how silly I was being for making such little things so important. The fact is, that while those events seem important at the time, they're really not. Not one thing by itself could ever be more memorable than the year I've spent here. While at first I thought maybe prom or spirit week could, they couldn't. The two things just can't compare.

To end this random thought process that really didn't have to do with anything,

I'll leave you with a quote I recently read that inspired this whole blog post. Reading this me made me think back to my worries about prom and other stuff and realize that, in order to live life to the fullest, (not to be extremely cliché or anything) I need to stop over thinking and worrying about everything and continue to take more adventures and risks like the one I took signing up for this year. Of course, this whole life-fulfillness thing didn't just dawn on me in Spain. Obviously I'd heard the stories from adults, warning us kids not to let life pass us by, but I guess it just never really resonated until now. The risk I took this year has so far been by far the most rewarding experience of my life and while I am very sad to have this chapter of my life come to an end, I'm also very excited to see what is up next for me.

Anyways,
Here's the quote..

“Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

^Yes I know that didn't really have anything to do with my post but, having so many endless hours to think in class somehow led me from that quote to this post

Thanks for reading!

Feriaaaa

So,

Feria.
It's so weird to think that the event I've been waiting for and hearing about for now over eight months, is over. Unfortunately, it went a lot faster for me because I was sick for the first three days. Lucky me.. Besides that though, Feria was definitely worth the wait, and it suprassed any previous expectations I had. People never seemed to rest during Feria. All my friends would get up bright and early every morning, put on their dresses or whatever the guys would wear (basically just nice clothes) and head to Feria. After spending the day walking around and looking at the “Casetas”, which are basically just booths made to be either restaurants or dancing areas, they would go home, change clothes, and go back out for a full night of partying. I honestly have no idea how people did that everyday. I did that routine for two days before I decided to stop going during the day due to the fact that it was impossible for me to get out of bed before 12:00.

I was finally able to try out my Flamenco dancing during Feria. I unfortunately didn't get a video because the days that I dressed up were so hot (over 100 degrees!) that the only time I actually danced was when someone would force me and even then it was only for just a couple minutes. Wearing those dresses in 100 degree weather actually felt like real torture. Between the long sleeves and the thick fabric, plus the little sash thing they make you wear, the ten pounds of makeup I was wearing melted straight off my face.

Speaking of the heat, IT IS SO HOT HERE! I'm pretty sure it has reached at least 100 almost every day for the past two weeks. Apparently this heat isn't normal but, I don't care. These last two weeks have been absolutely terrible. What makes it even worse is that there aren't air-conditioners or fans in my house. I'm currently sitting in my room, (the hottest room in the house) at 9:00 at night, dripping with sweat (disgusting but true), having to stop every 30 seconds to take a sip of water. Paying attention in class is basically impossible. I keep getting all these flashbacks to the beginning of the year when I was experiencing the same problem, although I don't remember it being this bad. Hopefully it'll cool down soon because I really don't want to remember my last few weeks here as being miserable.

Next week is going to be really hard for me because one of my best friends that I've made this year is leaving to go back to the United States. Luckily he only lives in New Hampshire so I'll get to see him once I get back but, still, it's definitely going to be different and sad not having him here. I hate saying goodbye. I hated it when I left and I hate it even more here. It's different here because saying goodbye to people is basically saying goodbye forever. When I left back in September, those goodbyes felt like they'd be forever because I never really thought about this year actually ending. Now that I'm close to the end though, I've realized how much harder it will be to say goodbye to all the friends I've made here. Sure, I'm already planning my next visit back here but, it won't be the same. Everyone will be separated, I won't be with my exchange friends, and I'll once again feel like a visitor instead of someone who lives here. All of this is still a month away so I don't have to worry about it quite yet but, him leaving keeps making me think about my own inevitable departure. Something I'm not quite yet ready to fully think about. I'll save that for later.

Anyways,

I have to go study Economy.....
como siempre...
Adioss

Here's a few pictures I took during Feria

Busy, Busy, Busy

Hola!
So,
A lot has happened since I last posted.

First, as I'm sure a few people know, the rest of my family came to visit me here in Jerez. From there we traveled to Malaga and Cadiz which was nice because I'd never been to Malaga and the beach in Cadiz is absolutely beautiful. I'm very excited to start spending all my weekends there before I leave, which by the way, is exactly two months from today! Of course, after I leave Jerez I'll be doing a little more traveling before I go back to the States but, to me, the day I leave Jerez is the day this year ends. I've never been more emotionally confused about anything in my entire life. I mean, on one hand, I can think about the fact that in just a little over eight weeks I'll be back home with my friends and family, in a place where I don't have to constantly think about what I want to say before I say it. On the other hand, I really have grown accustomed to my life here. Jerez is like a second home to me. The people here feel like my real friends and family, and I have a feeling that going back to speaking English all the time is going to end up boring me after a while. There's no challenge in it and I've come to learn that I need to be challenged or I will get extremely bored, extremely fast. Luckily I've signed myself for four AP classes next year which should be all the challenge I need for one year.

On a lighter note, I finally bought my flamenco dress last week! Feria is still more than two weeks away but I'm already super excited. People have been talking about this festival since literally the day that I got here. I'm not sure if I've talked about Feria before but if I haven't, it's basically like a bigger, longer, more amazing version of Clam Fest (for all the Yarmouth readers), for anyone outside of Yarmouth, picture the biggest fair you've ever been to and then double, maybe even triple it. The dress I bought is for the Sevillana dance that I've been learning. I don't have a picture of the exact dress yet but I'll put a picture of a slightly different one so you get the idea. The problem with the dress is, is that because I have broad swimmer shoulders instead of the typical tiny Spanish shoulders, the tailor has to make a lot of variations to the dress making it cost a fortune.. lucky me... (well, actually, lucky parents... heh heh)

I'm not looking forward to these next couple of weeks before Feria. Teachers, knowing nobody is going to school during Feria, have decided to assign a ton of homework and tests making me pretty stressed out. That, on top of my dance classes, on top of my new pact to go to the gym at least 3-4 times a week, on top of dress fittings, has me REALLY stressed out. The only reason I'm able to write this blog post is because I'd planned myself 20 minutes of nap time for today but decided that the time would be better used writing a blog post, considering how little I've been posting recently. Usually I do pretty well with stress but it's a lot harder when you have to add listening and speaking in another language on top of everything else. Basically, even though I just had one, I need a vacation.

In History, we've just started learning about World War II. Even though I already knew most of what was being taught, it was really interesting to hear what people had to say about it from a different country. Most people didn't even know what Pearl Harbor was, and had some pretty interesting opinions about the United States and their involvement. I can't explain everything because I still have trouble completely understanding what people are saying when they're not talking to me but, from what I understood, the general opinion of the class was that the United States had a very minimal affect on World War II. I guess when my classmates think of World War II, they generally just think of Germany and the Nazi's. Luckily, I have a really good History teacher here who is doing a pretty good job at enlightening my class just how complex that war actually was.

Anyways,

According to my pretty busy schedule, I now have to go the gym, then to a friends house to practice guitar (finally), and then back home for a nice fun three hours of homework.

Yayyy
Adioss

Cute, right?

Semana Santa in Jerez

So,
I'm sorry it has been almost been a month since I've posted but between exams, lack of internet, and Semana Santa, I've been really busy.


Starting from a few weeks ago, I finally finished my exams for the trimester. I won't go into my grades like I did last trimester but in short, I failed the same three classes as last time and my math grade improved by one whole point! Two points from passing! I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not going to pass math this year. Thankfully, I only need three years of math to graduate so as long as I study this summer, I should be fine for next year. As for the rest of my grades, the classes that I did pass were mostly the same as last trimester which while I was hoping to improve, at this point, I've sort of given up caring. As long as I pass, to me, that's all that really matters.


I'm currently on break for Semana Santa. I wanted to post earlier with more information about the holiday but, no matter how many people I asked, everyone kept telling me it was too hard to explain and that I just had to wait to see it for myself. Well, from what I've seen so far, Semana Santa has definitely lived up to its reputation. Basically, each day, hundreds of people gather to the central to see different “paso's” which are scenes depicting different events that Jesus went through in the time between his arrest and his death. There are also many "paso's" showing the Virgin Mary grieving over what has happened to her son. These scenes are sculptures carried all throughout the central as you'll see in the pictures below. In front of the sculptures are people wearing hooded costumes that I think are worn to grieve the death of Jesus, (don't quote me on that). I do know that they have absolutely nothing to do with the Ku Klux Klan except for the fact that the Ku Klux Klan may have gotten their costume inspiration from seeing the mourners in Semana Santa. At the end of each “paso” there is a huge marching band which plays intense, dramatic music. I've already heard all the music though considering they've been practicing right outside my house for months...... Behind the band, there is usually a huge group of people following the procession and chanting some sort of prayers. In the windows, there are people who sing traditional religious songs to the sculpture. I've only seen this once but, it was definitely nothing like any singing I've ever heard. It basically just sounded like a bunch of screaming but, I mean, everyone clapped at the end so I guess the screamings normal. Anyways, after I saw the first paso, I made it my mission to experience this holiday to the fullest. The majority of my friends have taken this week to do some traveling, but not me. I've gone out almost every day this week and so far, I've followed one of the processions for over two hours, participated in one of the religious chant things (even though I had no idea what it meant) and, was able to go inside the main cathedral of Jerez and watch as each paso “greeted God”. I was very lucky to be able to do this because only about 20 people out of thousands were able to get in. These next few days are I guess the most important days of Semana Santa and everyone's expected to get really dressed up. Unfortunately, all of my clothes are in the wash so, I don't know exactly how I'm going to do that. Oh well.

In other news, I've been taking my flamenco classes for almost a month now and I've already learned the first four parts! My teacher told me I was a natural which I just had to laugh at considering my previous dance experiences.... I apparently will be all set for Feria which is exciting. Now all I have to do is buy my dress which I still have yet to do..

Anyways,

It's 4:00 here which means I have to go start getting ready for this afternoon's processions.
Adiosss

 NOT the Ku Klux Klan

 Virgin Mary

Following one of the processions

These are only a few photos to give you the basic idea, I'll try and post more after Semana Santa is over

Ya lo sé, I'm a hypocrite

So,

As you may have guessed, it was really nice to see my mom last week. It was a little weird to see someone from Yarmouth here in Jerez but, it was cool to show her where I'd been living for the past six months and introduce her to all my friends. I was also able to go to Madrid which was definitely an interesting experience. It's true what they say, Madrid is just like New York, but with smaller buildings. The crowds were the same, the huge stores, the lit up billboards. It actually made me a little homesick for some reason but luckily I'm past that now. There really isn't any reason to be homesick anymore considering I have less than four months left before I go home for good.

I started my flamenco dance class on Monday which was definitely an interesting experience. I obviously am nowhere near ready for Feria but, I did learn a few steps which was pretty cool. It really is a beautiful dance and I'm excited to continue trying to learn it in the weeks to come. Despite all my previous complaints revolving around dancing, I am actually enjoying these classes. I'm going to look for Feria dresses soon with my host family and friends from school. They're all very excited about helping me pick out a dress. Today in school, the girls in my class had an argument about which color/style would look best on me. We never actually finished the debate but I'm leaving the choice up to them considering I know absolutely nothing about flamenco dresses and which kinds do/don't look good on a person.

I'm pretty sure Spain skipped spring. Two weeks ago, I was writing my blog post shivering in my room wearing two shirts and a sweatshirt with three blankets. Today, I'm sitting here in a t-shirt and shorts with a sunburn. This is apparently what the people of Jerez call Spring but considering the temperature feels about the same as Yarmouth in mid-July, I don't even want to know what Summer is going to be like. I most likely will come back to Yarmouth permanently sunburned......if that's even possible....

Semana Santa (Holy Week) begins in a couple of weeks and people are already excited. They've been setting up for the parade and festivities for about a week now and as I said, we still have two weeks left to get ready for everything. I think the main reason people are so excited is because we get the entire week off for vacation but still, it seems a little early to already start preparing. I won't go into too much detail now about what it's about but as it starts to get closer to Semana Santa I'll try and write more about it.

So apparently my grades for the second trimester are coming out soon which I'm already nervous for. I really have worked hard this trimester but I'm pretty sure my grades are worse than last trimester. This is because my teachers are really starting to treat me like part of the class and not give me any special attention. There are still teachers like my Literature and History teacher who really try to help me understand what's going on, but there are others, like my math teacher (who I swear sighs whenever I walk in the classroom) that just are no help whatsoever. This week, and next week, are exam weeks which are seriously the worst weeks ever. This week I had two math exams and on Friday I have a History and Philosophy exam. Next week, I have Economy on Monday, French and Science on Tuesday, English and Literature on Wednesday, another History exam on Thursday, and English on Friday.

Que miedooo.

Anyways,

I actually can't write anymore because my brain is starting to hurt just thinking about these next couple of weeks.

Good thing I can do some of this studying on the beach this weekend. ;)

Hasta Luego

-Libby

Granadaaa

So,

I got my vacation! Well, not really, it was only three extra days but, I'll take it. Monday and Tuesday were Andalucia celebration days which basically just means that nobody in Andalucia had to go to school or work. The reason I didn't have to go to school today is because my school is one of the only schools which actually takes strikes seriously so I ended up getting three days off instead of two. I'm not sure exactly what the strike is about but I'm sure it's either a bus strike or an unemployment strike. They used to be so exciting but 5.5 months later I've come to realize how common they actually are. I've had at least somewhere from 8-10 days off from school for strikes alone so far this year. In my opinion, it's not very smart on the schools part considering nobody actually goes to the strike but, because I'm just the exchange student, I've decided to just keep my mouth shut and enjoy the extra day off.

To celebrate the long weekend, my two exchange friends and I decided to go do some traveling all the way up to Granada. Well, Granada isn't actually that far from Jerez but with the 2 hour stop in Dos Hermanas, the trip actually ended up being six hours. If anyone who's reading this has ever been to Granada, I'm sure they'll agree with me when I say that it's definitely one of the most beautiful places in Spain, maybe even in all of Europe. Granted, I haven't actually seen most of Europe but, I just can't get over how amazing Granada is. If you need a little more convincing, Bill Clinton even said that the sun setting over the Alhambra is one the most beautiful things he had ever seen in his entire life. The thing that interested me most about Granada is how many different parts there are. For example, the street where I was staying was right in the middle of an Arabic market area. You could definitely see the Arabic lifestyle is still very much alive in Granada. I think some of it is just to attract tourists but I still found it to be pretty interesting. There's also the modern part of the city which looks just like any other Spanish city with big stores and chain restaurants. Between the Arabic markets, historic buildings, modern shopping, and absolutely amazing food, there was just no way we could do it all in three days. So, to solve this problem, my friends and I decided that obviously the only way to get everything done was to do...................a Segway Tour! (Bright green vests and helmets included) Needless to say, I've never felt more like a tourist in my entire life but, even with the embarrassment, I definitely don't regret going. We were able to see most of the important sites in a very short period of time which made the embarrassment worth it.

For me, going to Granada was definitely one of the best experiences I've had since being here, not only because of how beautiful it is but because of how independent and self-reliant I had to be. Even though I'm living in Spain with a family that's not my own, everything that I've needed so far has been taken care of by my local coordinator. I've never traveled overnight without an adult and I have to admit, it was a little scary. I was responsible for booking the hostel, buying the train ticket, taking care of my passport and bank cards, making sure I had all my stuff at all times. The amount of responsibility I had to take on so suddenly was a little scary at first but, after it was over, I felt proud that I'd been able to enjoy Granada without any significant problems. It made this year feel more like an adventure again. Before, this year was starting to feel like the weeks were just blurring together and that eventually it would just end suddenly. The time I spent in Granada felt like a break from thinking about how fast this year was going. I've decided I need to do more of those trips around Spain because I need more of those small breaks from reality.

Anyways,

I've started to make a new countdown! One week until I finally get to see someone from back home. Mom, if you're reading this, (which I know you will like five minutes after I post this) know that next week is going to be absolutely amazing so...get excited..

Just six days days left!

Happy Leap Day/Year/kinda forgot it was leap year until just now

Adioss

-Libby

Why am I not on break!

So,

I was wrong! February 8^h wasn't the last day of dancing! Last Thursday was... You see, February 8^th was the general recital where we performed in the gym only in front of the older grades. This was the performance we were graded on and guess what!?! I passed! That was by far the most exciting news I'd heard in a while. Thursday though, thursday was the actual performance, costumes and everything. My costume consisted of about 10 pounds of makeup, cut up t-shirt, and tights (not leggings)......that's it..... I have no idea how/why this was considered appropriate but I've come to realize that a lot of questionable things are seen as okay here. Anyways, after putting on that horrid costume, I had to dance in front of over 350 people! I've never been so embarrassed in my life but, luckily, my group was third so I got it out of the way early and had plenty of time to recuperate. After today though, I was reassured numerous times that I will never, ever, have to dance in public again.... that is, until Feria, but I'm not going to worry about that now.

Last Saturday, I made the somewhat stupid decision of deciding to go down to Cadiz for Carnaval. I've heard many horror stories about Carnaval but I decided that I had to see for myself. Basically, Carnaval is just an excuse for everyone to dress up and drink all night. It's kind of like Halloween but the costumes were way cooler and the parties were way more intense. I left for Cadiz at 9:30 dressed as a Hippie (the costume was pretty mild compared to everyone else but, it was free thanks to my hippie friend). Once I arrived, I was instantly surprised at 1. How many people were there, so many I could barely walk and 2. How detailed these costumes were. You could tell that people had been planning them for a while. The trains stopped running pretty soon after we got there and they didn't start back up until 7:00 that morning getting me home at around 8:00 that morning. When planning this trip, I kinda forgot how long almost 12 hours is for a party and needless to say, by the time I got home, I felt like I was never going to leave my bed. Overall, I did have fun in Cadiz but with all the waiting in line, the extreme over-tiredness, and the insane amount of drunk people, Carnaval didn't quite live up to my expectations. I am glad I went but I don't think it's something I'll ever do again....ever.. It was definitely worth experiencing though.

A new exchange student arrived in my house today from Germany. She's only staying for the week and I can already tell this is going to be a long week. She seems really nice but she's also insanely energetic. She speaks both Spanish and English which is nice even though she refuses to speak English to me. I really would like to get to know her but between studying, swimming, and my new dance classes (yep) I just don't think I have time. Even though we probably won't end up becoming the best of friends, it's still nice to have her here.

It has been really hard to go to school when everyone else back home is on break. It has taken all the motivation right out of me. For instance, today, I got home, skipped swimming, took a nap, cleaned my room (or well...started....it was taking too much energy), painted my nails (I don't do that!) and now I'm sitting here writing this while watching television in English because I'm too lazy to try and understand it in Spanish. I've decided to blame it on the fact that I'm either still recuperating from Saturday, or the fact that all day I've been reading status's about people's nice relaxing vacations and I feel as though I should be on vacation too. Either way, tomorrow I'm making myself be more productive.

Anyways,

This post has actually taken me like three hours to write because at the moment my procrastination is at its peak right now. I promise I'll try and post more but honestly, there really isn't that much to say. After five months, my life seems so normal I sometimes forget what it was like living in the U.S. It's weird but it's true. 

I love dancing...

I'm getting extremely lazy and writing posts without actually posting them because that requires me to actually go downstairs for internet... sorry.....

So,

Halfway.

The first semester kids have all gone home and the second semester kids have arrived and are settled in. A new exchange student came here to Jerez from Australia and she's actually going to be staying with my host aunt. I have yet to meet her but I'm sure I will sooner or later. She apparently speaks zero Spanish so it's my job to show her around and help her with her Spanish. When my host mom first asked me about helping her out, I felt so proud of myself that she thought I was far along enough with my Spanish and with my knowledge of the city that I could actually help someone else out. It's the first time I felt like finally I'm not some American tourist who's only here for a short period of time. I've been here 4.5 months! I consider myself at home here which is something I honestly never expected to happen. I've already started to plan my travel plans for returning home which is definitely not something I've enjoyed doing.

A couple of days ago, a man from my program came to check up on us American exchange students. When he came to my house with my local coordinator to talk to my host mom, my host mom told him that she's very frustrated with how I eat. She couldn't stop going on about how I don't eat and her frustrations with me. I didn't know she felt so strongly which has made these past 48 hours a little awkward. The problem with my situation is that my host mom hates to cook so we literally have the same things every week. Granted, the food she makes is amazing but it's a lot of the same thing so I've just kind of resorted to eating less and less which I guess has made her frustrated. She's also concerned that I don't talk enough and when she said that I had so many arguments and things to say back to her but I kept quiet. Not because of the language barrier, (I was actually thinking of all the things to say to her in Spanish) but because since being here I've learned to pick and choose my battles which is something that for people who know me back home know isn't one of my strong suits. I'll admit I love to argue and I can hold a grudge longer than anyone. Here though, there are so many things that annoy me or make me angry that I can't argue or be annoyed at everything or I would almost never be happy. I think one way I've grown since being here is by learning to forgive people and not let little things get to me like they used to.

Obviously, my host mom isn't actually angry at me I just seem to frustrate her a lot whether it be me forgetting to clean my room, not eating everything she gives me, or never giving her clothes to wash because I feel awkward not having to do anything. I love my host family and I'm pretty sure they love me too it's just hard to create relationships with people when you don't speak the same language. Most of the friends I have here speak some English and we gradually just switched over to speaking in Spanish. I can see though that as my Spanish grows stronger so does the relationship between me and my host family.

For the past month I've been desperately awaiting February 9^th. Not only because it's the birthday of a friend of mine but also because it's the day after our schools dance recital. Apparently, all of our dance tests over the past few months are actually leading up to something. Next Wednesday, the entire school is putting on some kind of dance recital where every group who has a dance has to perform it in front of the entire school. When I first heard this, I just started laughing until I realized that they were completely serious. Since then, I've come to learn that this is actually one of the most important days of the year. I've even had to practice with my group on the weekends and we've been planning costumes since after winter break. At first, I was extremely nervous because I basically never dance let alone in front of people but now for some reason my nerves have gone away. I'm pretty sure it's because I know that everyone knows I hate to/can't dance so they don't take me too seriously.

Today I talked to my host mom about possibly signing me up for Spanish cooking/flamenco classes because despite what I just ranted about with my hatred for dancing, I would actually like to learn some flamenco dance. The reason for this is that in May, there's this huge week long fair that's basically based around this dance. I figure, actually learning some of the dance might be a good idea for me to do. I also want to take a cooking class, mostly to learn how to make Paella because there's no way I'm going home without some lessons on how to make this wonderful Spanish dish.

Anyways,

Today is obviously Friday but I felt the need to update on what's been going on here recently. Now I have to clean my room because one of my American friends is coming to stay the night with me.

Ew...cleaning...

Adiossss

-Libby

You know you're living in Jerez when

So,

Almost every blog I've read has written this type of post at one point or another so I figure since I've been here four months, (four months!! my god) I should probably write one too.

1. Wearing shoes inside at all times is completely normal.

2. Dinner before 10 only happens on special occasions.
3. Friday nights are typically for homework. Sundays are for sleeping and more homework (if you're crazy enough not to finish it on Friday)
4. You consume Olive Oil like water
5. You arrange to meet up with people at a certain time and they come half an hour later claiming they're on time
6. You get stared at for wearing sweatpants in public (outside of school)
7. Cheating in school is so easy it almost seems expected
8. Kids drive motorcycles instead of cars
9. In school you write on graph paper instead of line paper
10. It doesn't matter how cold it is, when going out with friends, 90% of the kids, (usually if they're going to a club after), look like they're dressed for summer. (shorts, skirts, short dresses.. no coats!)
11. Not taking a nap after school is seen as strange.
12. Homework isn't checked by the teachers making it basically pointless.
13. No teacher, no class
14. People will skip going out just to watch soccer .
15. Real Madrid or Barcelona? Pick one and stick to it.
16. Taking selfies in random bathroom mirrors is normal/cool
17. Making that selfie the background on your phone is also normal/cool
18. What's Facebook? Everyone knows Tuenti is way cooler (well I still haven't come to this conclusion but, since I'm pretending I'm Spanish I try to convince people I do.
19. Everyone tweets every single thing they do at every waking moment of every day, because obviously everyone cares about the exact moment you wake up, eat breakfast, etc.
20. Fighting the urge to throw all your trash on the ground is slowing getting harder and harder to do.
21. Sometimes it feels like you breathe more second hand smoke than actual clean air.
22. Gym class is basically dance class
23. Everyone has a blackberry, not an
24. EVERYONE has a nickname, I've acquired about 10 since being here.
25. Wait.. there are speed limits?
26. Family is extremely important.
27. All photos must be approved immediately after being taken. One photo could have to be taken five or six times until everyone's happy.
28. The majority or the music people own (okay all the music) was illegally downloaded.
29. Staying after school is some kind of weird joke.
30. The majority of people aren't drinking coffee in mugs but in glass cups
31. You know what a “cani” is and you can spot one from a mile away
32. You're used to the surprised faces of the workers of Telepizza when you order a cheese pizza instead of one with five different kinds of meet.
33. Global Warming isn't at all important to most teenagers and even some adults
34. Everyone yells...all the time..
35. Kids driving in cars blasting their music for the entire world to hear are considered cool.
36. White-out is used for every mistake, even for personal notes.
37. You know the street performers better than your neighbors
38. Strangers are for the most part extremely nice and helpful.
39. No matter how hard you try to hide, you can't get out of the two kiss greeting.
40. Nobody pronounces Nike correctly.
41. Texting in class is surprisingly easy. I swear the desks are designed just for texting.. not that I take advantage of that or anything.
42. Teachers are often called by their first name.
43. You live for the weekends.
44. You speak Andalusian Spanish, which is obviously completely different from regular Spanish

I've been working on this post for about a week now and I know there are so many other things I could put on this list so, if I think of them, maybe I'll write a follow up post. 

Abrazos y Besos,

-Libby

Por Fin!

So,

I know it's been a while since I've updated. I don't really have a good excuse except for the fact that last week was still vacation and writing a new post just sort of slipped my mind. Today is my first day back at school and it was definitely one of the hardest days I've had since I've been here. All vacation I was going to bed at 3 or 4 and waking up at 12 which made today's 7:00 wake up extremely difficult. Having economy first period only added to the difficulty of the day and by the end I could barely keep my eyes open.

Even though it has been 10 days since New Years, I still feel like I should explain at least a brief summary of what went down.

Of course, we didn't leave for the party until around 2:00 a.m. Before that though, we went over to my host grandparent's for yet another big family dinner. I planned ahead for this one though and didn't eat anything all day which allowed me to make it all the way to course . At 5 minutes to midnight, my parents got out the champagne and divided grapes onto separate napkins. For anyone who doesn't know, it's a tradition in Spain to eat 12 grapes on the last 12 seconds of the year. One for every second. I unfortunately only made it to six because I kept laughing at how focused everyone looked. The idea is that if you successfully eat all 12, you'll have good luck throughout the year. After that, my host sister and I headed over to Oxi where I once again somehow had no problem getting in, even though it's one of the hardest clubs to get into if you're underage. You'd figure they would want to be more careful with foreigners, but I guess not. We stayed in Oxi until about 6:00 in the morning and by that time I was basically a zombie I was so tired. My host sister was still full of energy though so we ended up walking about a mile (in heels) to find churros. I didn't end up getting home and going to sleep until around 8:30 in the morning, right as the sun was coming up. I don't know why my host mom thought this was okay, but at 12:30 that afternoon she woke me up so we could go back over to my grandparents. I was only allowed four hours of sleep after being awake a full 24 hours. That was definitely not one of my better days. It didn't even hit me it was 2012 until the a couple days later, after I'd recuperated. Even though it was extremely exhausting, New Years in Spain was definitely one of the best New Years I've ever had.

As I've mentioned a few times, the 6^th , was also an important day here in Spain. It was the day of the Three Kings which if you're religious, is more important than Christmas because it's the day of the Epiphany. For most Spanish families, Santa Claus doesn't exist. Instead, the kids have to go to bed early so the three kings can bring them their presents. I ended up getting three scarves, a bracelet, and slippers, which was a lot more than I was expecting. After opening presents, we went to four different houses to drop off gifts for relatives. Of course, my host family made me eat at every single house so by the end of the day I was feeling extremely sick. Overall, I enjoyed the 6^th a lot more than Christmas itself because it actually felt like a holiday. Although, at the end of the day, I was glad for it to be over because 12 days is a long time to be constantly celebrating. I ate more food in those 12 days than I usually do in a month. Thankfully, I finally renewed my gym membership, which I will definitely be putting to good use.

I've been thinking a lot about what my New Years Resolutions should be, and I've decided on the following few things.

1. Stop worrying about how much time I have left
2. Speak more Spanish (obviously)
3. Travel to some other country outside of Spain
4. Navigate more than one train by myself
5. Learn how to cook paella
6. Learn one Spanish on guitar
7. Learn how to flamenco dance (haha....jokes)

And many more that have nothing to do with being in Spain.

A couple of days ago I made a breakthrough with my Spanish. I've been able to have pretty basic conversations in Spanish for a while now but, the other day I had my first successful argument. Well, it was more of a friendly debate but, I was really proud of myself after because I've never really been able to explain my opinions before in Spanish. It felt good to know that I was saying full sentences without having to think, and having people actually understand me.

Anyways,

I somehow already have a history test that I really should go study for.

Adios

-Libby